Aug. 17th, 2022 02:35 pm
My alterhuman identity
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draconicdogMy last entry focused on my history with alterhumanity: where I got started, what I did in the community, and a general timeline regarding the development of my identity. This entry will discuss my alterhumanity itself: what I am, how I am alterhuman, and how I understand myself through the lens of alterhumanity. I will also reference the earlier version of my alterhumanity, from 2015-2018, before I left the community for two years. Gentle warning that this entry will be somewhat disorganized/poorly written as I'm more focused on getting my thoughts down than writing good prose.
To provide the groundwork for my identity, I'll list my kintypes in no particular order:
Fictotypes aside, I'm also otherkin: I'm a dragon and a canine. I know a lot of folks know details about their kintypes, such as their appearance, personality, and other details of the 'type's existence, but I don't, especially regarding my canine self. I'm simultaneously a fox, a wolf, a coyote, and a dog, and all of these identities are distinct yet they are one. It's kind of confusing, even for me, as I'm still trying to figure it out, and I intend on delving deeper into this in the future through meditation and other spiritual practices.
Regarding spirituality: I'm not quite certain whether I'm a spiritual or psychological alterhuman. To me, my inner self is my kintypes, all at once and distinctly, so I guess you could say that my soul is that of my kintypes? I'm not entirely certain whether I lived past lives as my 'types, though I am certainly open to the possibility and have even previously been convinced that my 'types were based on reincarnation. I also think that psychology plays a part in my alterhumanity, but that's just a hunch and I don't have an explanation for it.
I also don't consider myself non-human nor human, which is why I enjoy the alterhuman label so much. I'm a human with an unusual experience of humanity, or you could think of it as if I'm a creature experiencing humanity to its fullest. I enjoy living a human life, I think there's much to gain from this experience, but I am a dragon, I am a dog, I'm a Pokémon, and so much more.
Here's the disorganization I was talking about at the beginning of this entry, because I'm going to jump back to the topic of polymorphology instead of editing the earlier paragraph where I talked about it (fuck it, we ball). I think the main reason why I think I'm a polymorph is because I am all my kintypes at once, but they are all individual identities, but they're all one unit of identity within myself. ALSO: I think of my otherkin identity and my fictionkin identity separately! That's worth mentioning. And now that I'm thinking about polymorphology, it would explain my fictionkin identity from 2015-2018. For context, let me show you my kintypes from that time (the ones that I can remember at least):
please ignore that the font for this list is wonky, i don't want to fix it
Obviously!!! I had WAY more kintypes than I do now! Until now, I chalked this up to the fact that I was young (13-16) and was quick to confirm kintypes as they occurred to me (which I still do!). Now that I'm thinking carefully about being a polymorph, it would make a LOT of sense that I would sometimes morph into characters for a little bit without permanently adopting them into my identity.
My leading theory right now is that I'm a dragon and a dog, but I morph into fictional characters, some more than others, which influences whether or not I consider them a kintype. Although, I guess polymorphs don't have a base form, so that would make me a shapeshifter? I do like the polymorph label more, and the way that I fully adopt the identity of my fictotypes is a polymorph experience... Much to consider...
Quick summary of this entry: I'm an otherkin, fictionkin, and sometimes therianthropic alterhuman. I'll need to look into polymorphology a bit more, and I'll try and update with what I find and what my conclusions are. I want to reiterate that the first, shorter list of kintypes that I provided is my current identity, and the second, much longer list is very outdated!!! I promise I don't identify as the Onceler anymore!!!it's pretty funny though, you can laugh
If you took the time to wade through this muck of an entry, thank you so much! I appreciate it! I kind of jumped from topic to topic a lot, but my alterhumanity is pretty convoluted and I was struggling to think of a coherent structure to approach it from. So, we're left with this.
Until next time! mwah mwah mwah mwah
To provide the groundwork for my identity, I'll list my kintypes in no particular order:
- Dragon
- Canine (wolf, coyote, fox, and dog)
- Lucario (Pokémon)
- Giratina (Pokémon)
- Lugia (Pokémon)
- Legoshi (Beastars)
- Tris Prior (Divergent)
- Asriel Dreemurr (Undertale)
- Ralsei (Deltarune)
- Mae Borowski (Night in the Woods)
- The Tenth Doctor (Doctor Who)
- Catra (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power)
- Shadow the Hedgehog (Sonic the Hedgehog)
Fictotypes aside, I'm also otherkin: I'm a dragon and a canine. I know a lot of folks know details about their kintypes, such as their appearance, personality, and other details of the 'type's existence, but I don't, especially regarding my canine self. I'm simultaneously a fox, a wolf, a coyote, and a dog, and all of these identities are distinct yet they are one. It's kind of confusing, even for me, as I'm still trying to figure it out, and I intend on delving deeper into this in the future through meditation and other spiritual practices.
Regarding spirituality: I'm not quite certain whether I'm a spiritual or psychological alterhuman. To me, my inner self is my kintypes, all at once and distinctly, so I guess you could say that my soul is that of my kintypes? I'm not entirely certain whether I lived past lives as my 'types, though I am certainly open to the possibility and have even previously been convinced that my 'types were based on reincarnation. I also think that psychology plays a part in my alterhumanity, but that's just a hunch and I don't have an explanation for it.
I also don't consider myself non-human nor human, which is why I enjoy the alterhuman label so much. I'm a human with an unusual experience of humanity, or you could think of it as if I'm a creature experiencing humanity to its fullest. I enjoy living a human life, I think there's much to gain from this experience, but I am a dragon, I am a dog, I'm a Pokémon, and so much more.
Here's the disorganization I was talking about at the beginning of this entry, because I'm going to jump back to the topic of polymorphology instead of editing the earlier paragraph where I talked about it (fuck it, we ball). I think the main reason why I think I'm a polymorph is because I am all my kintypes at once, but they are all individual identities, but they're all one unit of identity within myself. ALSO: I think of my otherkin identity and my fictionkin identity separately! That's worth mentioning. And now that I'm thinking about polymorphology, it would explain my fictionkin identity from 2015-2018. For context, let me show you my kintypes from that time (the ones that I can remember at least):
- Tris Prior (Divergent)
- Asriel Dreemurr (Undertale)
- Pokémon:
- Lucario
- Charizard
- Lugia
- Harry Hart/Agent Galahad (the Kingsman franchise)
- Elliott the dragon (Pete’s Dragon [2016])
- Ted Mosby (How I Met Your Mother)
- Leonard Hofstadter (The Big Bang Theory)
- The Tenth Doctor (Doctor Who)
- Sam Winchester (Supernatural)
- Sherlock Holmes (BBC Sherlock)
- Katniss Everdeen (The Hunger Games)
- Otherkin: dragon, bobcat, angel
- Judy Hopps (Zootopia)
- Wanda Maximoff/Scarlet Witch (MCU)
- The Onceler (The Lorax [2012])
- Molayne (Pokémon Sun/Moon)
- Arlo (The Good Dinosaur)
- Jayjay (Vivziepop OC)
- Damian (Zoophobia)
- Cristina Yang (Grey's Anatomy)
- Jack Frost (Rise of the Guardians)
- Hiro Hamada or Tadashi Hamada (Big Hero 6)
- Daniel Atlas (Now You See Me franchise)
- Charles Xavier (X-Men)
- Spock (Star Trek)
- Kyoya (Ouran High School Host Club)
- Light Yagami (Death Note)
- Peter Quill/Star Lord (Guardians of the Galaxy)
- Pearl (Steven Universe)
- Ben Wyatt (Parks and Recreation)
- Piper Chapman (Orange is the New Black)
- Arthur (Arthur Christmas)
- The Clock (Don't Hug Me I'm Scared)
- Atticus Finch (To Kill A Mockingbird)
- Kintypes I questioned, but didn't confirm (maybe)
- Alexander Hamilton (Hamilton)
- King George III (Hamilton)
- Maria Reynolds (Hamilton)
- Veronica Sawyer (Heathers)
- Bowser (Mario Franchise)
- Tony Stark/Iron Man (MCU)
- Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III (How to Train Your Dragon)
- Toothless (How to Train Your Dragon)
Obviously!!! I had WAY more kintypes than I do now! Until now, I chalked this up to the fact that I was young (13-16) and was quick to confirm kintypes as they occurred to me (which I still do!). Now that I'm thinking carefully about being a polymorph, it would make a LOT of sense that I would sometimes morph into characters for a little bit without permanently adopting them into my identity.
My leading theory right now is that I'm a dragon and a dog, but I morph into fictional characters, some more than others, which influences whether or not I consider them a kintype. Although, I guess polymorphs don't have a base form, so that would make me a shapeshifter? I do like the polymorph label more, and the way that I fully adopt the identity of my fictotypes is a polymorph experience... Much to consider...
————
Quick summary of this entry: I'm an otherkin, fictionkin, and sometimes therianthropic alterhuman. I'll need to look into polymorphology a bit more, and I'll try and update with what I find and what my conclusions are. I want to reiterate that the first, shorter list of kintypes that I provided is my current identity, and the second, much longer list is very outdated!!! I promise I don't identify as the Onceler anymore!!!
If you took the time to wade through this muck of an entry, thank you so much! I appreciate it! I kind of jumped from topic to topic a lot, but my alterhumanity is pretty convoluted and I was struggling to think of a coherent structure to approach it from. So, we're left with this.
Until next time! mwah mwah mwah mwah
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